I find myself becoming more fearless in my ability to put myself first. By me, I mean, my priorities, dreams, and desires to become more. A lot of people like to say it’s the easiest task in the world, but kind hearts know, it’s easier said than done. You tend to put yourself before others just naturally. As if it’s like taking a breath. Unfortunately, as we should know, there are individuals in the world that will disregard such natural instinct. Is it always other people? No. We, as in you and I, are often times victims of our own creation. We allow others to continuously treat us in ways that bother us but never to rarely vocalize such things. Perhaps you like to avoid confrontation? Regardless of the reasoning behind your (also my) methodology, it all boils down to not vocalizing the things that cause internal disarray.
It’s generally always easier to play the victim. It takes a strong will to not only view but dissect the not so perfect aspect of ourselves. It’s needed though. At least I like to believe. I believe it’s part of the constant self-growth we endure until we cease to physically exist upon this world. We, I, can’t allow outside forces to cause a detour from what is desired. That doesn’t negate the fact that I’m completely capable of sharing experiences with others or allows others to navigate my journey with me. However, I, we, must stand firm that this is our journey to dictate.
I confess, I slightly chuckle in the back of my mind at the entitlement people have that they can essentially tell you what to do, outside of the realm of work. Obviously if you have a boss, they’ll be telling you what to do and how it should be done to some capacity. I’m talking about on a personal level. The level that involves your aspirations, favorites, and the destinations you visualize you’ll arrive and/or pass on your journey to become the best version of yourself.
Ultimately, we do not need someone’s permission to navigate our journey. It is the pilot’s desire, if they wish, to have passengers on their plane. I think it’s important to learn that about ourselves and others. No one truly owes us anything, unless you’ve put in your time at work and you’re expecting a pay check. As far as family, friends, and any other individual that doesn’t account for your income, no one truly owes us anything. People are nice and give pieces or all of themselves because that’s what they genuinely wish to do. It’s not required though. We must respect those that wish to put themselves first because we do not always know the avenues others have traveled to be where and who they are in this moment in time.
Be kind, but don’t become consumed that you lose yourself. Recognize that there will be people that will drain you in order to get even the slightest bit of energy. There is a difference between helping others out of the goodness of your heart and enabling others. There is no template, no one-size fits all approach to quite a few social dynamics. Just always listen to the voice you have within. Be confident enough to never apologize for whatever you deem necessary to protect your energy, mind, and the destinations you envision yourself.
- Alex N. Wanderland